I spent the past several months worrying about school, school work, and trying to have a life between work and school. I had a million things going on at once and I was lucky I could get a sketch in here or there. Now, finally, I can do my own art work. I don’t have to worry that I’m ruining my façade of an art career by going back to school (well until September when I can think I’m jeopardizing my fake art career again by doing school work instead of artwork). I should feel free.. instead I feel listless. I have all this freedom to do my own artwork and stare blankly at my sketchbook… and be incredibly frustrated in the process.
After much staring at the blank page, I came up with this one today.
Of course the biggest part of my frustration might actually not be making art but a big change in my life (other than school) My non-American girlfriend left the country. That’s right, I wasn’t dating a U.S. citizen and if you don’t like it you can stop reading this blog. I personally think people should be able to live where ever the hell they want. The government seems to disagree. Of course, if the president or some high-ranking official were seeing an immigrant of the same sex, things would change and we all fucking know it. But there isn’t, so all of us in a same-sex international relationship are just plain fucked. Unless your wealthy, then you can leave to go be with your international hottie. I can not. I am broke, did I mention my fake art career?
I have my paintings, drawings and photography to pour all my blood, sweat, tears, frustrations, and longings into, or not.